The Same Old Same Old
entering my sixth month of unemployment. Frankly, I am enjoying my life
as a pauper, although one would be hard-pressed to tell. I have also had
recurring thoughts of cleaning the desk off with the back of my hand, as
it were, just like G did in that now infamous episode of Homicide.
There was something inherently comical about seeing the blotter and the
pen set flying across the room. Frankly, I have never seen anyone clean
off a desk like that. Can that just be considered a dramatic embellishment?
These are the kinds of questions that I hope to answer this season and
the Desk Off
Monday June 1, 1998
I received my first assignment from the employment
agency, so I had to go downtown to fill out some paperwork. The assignment
commences on Thursday and will last for three weeks. I will be working
with several other apparently unemployed computer nerds. The pay is not
exactly something to get excited about, but it is about the same as the
job that required the steel-toed boots. So, it's back to wage slavery for
the ol' lavahead.
Times are rough here in Hawai'i and I've done my
share of lamenting at the Wailing Wall like many other people. However,
those recurring thoughts of cleaning off the desk (like G did in Homicide)
may be an indicator of something related to this situation. Perhaps it's
time that the ol' lavahead cleaned off his desk. The problem is ... I don't
have a desk. Then, it dawned on me. This is an election year and the Governor's
office is up for grabs. The selection of candidates is as generic as could
be anticipated. Each candidate is spending a ton of dough. Each is slinging
the usual mud at the others. And, each is representing a variety of special
interest groups. I am always surprised to see how limited the choices are.
No wonder we're in such bad shape! So, the ol' lavahead has decided to
run for Governor. That's right. I'm going to run my grassroots campaign
on the Web with little or no dough. If the Net is the great equalizer,
then the proof will be self-evident. Actually, I doubt that this will go
far, although I'm constructing a "whitepaper" and will upload it soon.
Tuesday June 2
I must have been in some kind of temporal zone
that plays tricks with the mind. Why else would I have even come up with
the lame idea of running for Governor, no less running a campaign from
the Web? Sheesh! All I am is a loser and a minimum wage "temp" worker.
My mind is starting to play tricks on me. I need to know my place in the
food chain. I'm just the caretaker at the Overlook Hotel. I've always been
the caretaker. Remember that nonsense from The Shining? I was actually
taking the Governor's race a little too seriously. I fear that I may be
prone to psychotic episodes. Heck, one of my ideas is called the Five-O
Initiative. If you guessed that it has something to do with cops, then
you are correct. The initative is basically a plan to establish a State
Police force. As Governor, the ol' lavahead would be the Commander-in-Chief.
Can you imagine what the various dignitaries will think when they see the
Governor wearing a uniform complete with assorted fake medals and packing
a 9mm at his side?
Wednesday June 3
I am compelled to write filler material even though
the journal is supposed to be written on an "as needed" basis. Once again,
my disposition to psychotic episodes is showing. I feel that I have an
obligation to write something to satisfy some elusive need, I suppose.
Or, maybe I have more grandiose perceptions of the size of the LoserNet
audience. Lord knows I have nothing important to say. Therefore, I should
delve into my psychotic world as the pseudo-Governor of Hawai'i. I plan
to return most of the Governor's salary to the State. I would also refuse
to live in Washington Place, the Governor's mansion. And, I would refuse
to ride in the Governor's chauffeured limousine. Instead, I will trade
in my six-four for a 1968 Plymouth Satellite. Say, didn't Jerry Brown do
that as Governor of Cali a few years ago? Well, I'm going to have to wait
until I see Bulworth before I come up with more brilliant ideas.
will be my first day at my first "temp" assignment. Naturally, that did
not preclude an evening at Barnes & Noble. Lori bought the Erykah Badu
CD, Baduizm, for the ol' lavahead. I will have to unbox my beloved
Bose Wave radio for the occassion. Have you noticed that Bose has really
stepped up the advertising campaign for the Wave radio? I hope that it
does not turn into a mainstream fad item. Then, I'd have to get rid of
it. Well, hey! I'm not a mainstream kind-of-a-guy!
Thursday June 4
I can't say that I was really happy to enter the
world of wage slavery, no less as a minimum wage slave. Five of us are
working for FiServ, a mainland firm. We are setting up the computer network
wiring for Territorial Savings, a small local bank. The job is basically
something that a monkey could do, so we get paid exactly what a monkey
would get paid. Actually, a monkey would be given a bunch of bananas, which
would be equivalent to four times what we get paid. Sheesh! There was not
much for us to do today since none of the materials had arrived from the
mainland yet. The five of us that comprise the crew are an interesting
mix of personalities. The one trait we seem to have in common is that we
are all losers. We are the only people in Hawai'i who cannot get real jobs
in the computer field.
Friday June 5
We actually were able to do some work today since
the materials finally arrived from the mainland. So, we completed one of
the bank branches in the Moilili area. Our job is to wire the buildings
for the new computer systems. Basically, we are unskilled laborers. The
real computer people will come in after us and install the equipment. Two
of the other guys I work with seem somewhat disappointed with the situation.
I don't blame them. We are not gaining any valuable experience per se
since we are unskilled laborers. And, we are only making a little bit more
than the minimum wage of $5 per hour. I could sense the frustration in
their voices as they related, almost verbatim, the very same things
that I have discussed ad nauseam. Well, it looks as though everything
I have predicted has come true with the exception that I am not working
for the same pay at Burger King. Would I have been better off at Burger
King? That's hard to say. I don't think that I would be inhaling fiberglass
particles all day at Burger King.
Saturday June 6
We put in a 12-hour day at work today. I did not
get home until 9:30pm and I was extremely fatigued. What's worse is that
I earned only a few measly dollars. The work is hard and dirty. I spent
several hours pulling cables through the drop ceilings. I was coated with
fiberglass particles from the insulation by the end of the day. During
lunch, one of the guys went to buy some breathing masks for us. The cheap
mask only sufficed as a placebo. The central air conditioning shut down
at about one o' clock. This is standard operating procedure since no one
is usually in the building on weekends. The ambient temperature quickly
soared and we could do little about it. There are no windows to open for
fresh air up on the 14th floor. We worked steadily until 8 o' clock in
the sweltering heat and the stale air filled with fiberglass particles.
All the while, I realized that this was my true lot in life.
My sense of humor as well as my desire to write
anything for the journal has diminished significantly. To say that I am
"in a funk" (as Steph would say) would be a major understatement. In fact,
I am in more of a fragile mental state than when I was unemployed and sitting
in my favorite chair all day. One really has to laugh. The guy who is heading
our work crew is from the mainland. He is the national manager for the
network installation group. He probably makes close to a six-figure income.
Of course, he has been getting his hands dirty along with us, with the
exception that he makes about $100 per hour. I guess that I should laugh
since the joke is apparently on me.
Sunday June 7
The air was already hot and stale when we started
working at 8 o' clock this morning. We managed to work a full day, even
though all of us were ready to pass out. Today, we wired the 10th floor.
Once again, I spent most of my time routing cables through the ceiling.
I don't need to do a Stairmaster workout these days since I am constantly
going up and down a ladder all day. I guess that I should be thankful.
I really don't have to do any thinking and my responsibilities are extremely
limited. I also enjoy working with my fellow minimum wage slave losers.
At the end of the day, I can leave my work behind and go home.
My expenses have gone up considerably, too. I don't
bring my lunch like I used to when I worked a long, long time ago. Instead,
I buy my lunch along with the rest of the crew. So far, that has averaged
about $10 per day. So, I must work two hours just to pay for my lunch.
Monday June 8
We only worked a little over five hours today.
I don't think that our boss realized that the banks in Hawai'i close at
3 o' clock. Thus, we were not able to finish the downtown branch office.
I have also noticed that there has been quite a bit of resistance to the
new network installation. Even at the corporate office, there seemed to
be obvious indicators. For example, many of the executives were given notice
that we would be installing the cabling this past weekend. Most of the
offices had crap scattered about everywhere in a seemingly deliberate attempt
to impede our work. Why take it out on us? We're just the unskilled laborers
... squirrels trying to get a nut. As I sat in the lobby this morning,
I overheard a bank employee talking to the receptionist. "Why are they
doing all of this Year 2000 stuff now? Why not wait until the year 2000
to change it since it has to be done then anyway?" she asked. Do you see
why Hawai'i is doomed?
Tuesday June 9
Our crew separated into two teams for the first
time. I ended up on the team that went to the Kaimuki branch office. That
was fine with me since it is a lot closer to Hawai'i Kai. However, the
address I was given was wrong. Fortunately, one of the employees at the
coffee shop where I bought a cup of coffee also happened to bank at the
branch I was looking for. It turned out to be only a couple of blocks away.
The people at the Kaimuki branch were a lot friendlier than the people
we have met so far at the other branches and at the main office. They were
very nice to us and also very cooperative. They also treated all their
customers well. There was a strong sense of the kama'aina spirit
there. In fact, I was tempted to open an account there. However, I have
There has been some tension in the ranks at work
because one of the guys seems to think that he is second in command. I
call him the luna, which is an old sugar cane plantation term for
"boss." Steve hasn't figured out what that means, although he has lived
in Hawai'i for 12 years. One has to be a local boy to be familiar that
term. There is also another Steve working on the crew. He also has a strong
personality but he does not think that he is the luna. When the
two Steves work together, as is often the case since they are so similar,
they tend to butt heads on a variety of issues. Sometimes it is comical
to watch. Neither of the two other guys want to work with the luna.
In fact, Nathan had a talk with Chris, our real boss, yesterday. He addressed
a few concerns about the luna which will affect future scheduling.
One team will have to fly to three of the neighbor islands to install cabling
at those locations. The two Steves were pretty sure that they would be
chosen to go. Nathan told me that Chris wants him and I to be on the island-hopping
team. Poor Jerrod may be the unfortunate soul to remain here and work with
the two Steves.
I got off work earlier than I expected. When I
arrived home, I found moms in bed. She was not feeling well at all. She
suffered from dizziness and vertigo all afternoon. She could barely walk
to kitchen. Moms said that this has happened before, which did little to
comfort me. In fact, I am very worried about moms. She just doesn't want
to slow down. I can't say that I blame her.
Wednesday June 10
I met the luna and his sidekick at the
Hawai'i Kai branch office this morning. The people at the branch were a
little tense, probably justifiable since the branch just opened this week.
The two Steves were oblivious to the situation. Without doing much planning,
they frantically began working. They were yelling and running amuck. I
could see the tension rising amongst the branch employees. The luna
inadvertently disabled the bank's security system within the first ten
minutes. I knew that I had to get out of there. So, I called Chris to advise
him of the situation. Jerrod was on his way to deliver parts to us, so
I was to catch a ride with him back to the Ala Mo's branch.
I couldn't get out of the Hawai'i Kai branch quick
enough. When we arrived at Ala Mo's, we found that there was nothing we
could do there. Most of the work would require a contractor. So, Chris
deployed us elsewhere. We first traveled back to the Hawai'i Kai branch
to certify the cabling installed by the luna and his sidekick. There
were only five terminations and the server hub itself. Of the five, two
failed and two were wired incorrectly. The luna was supposed to
leave all of the short patch cables with us since we were going to certify
two other branches and complete the hub installation. Naturally, the luna
left us only five cables, just enough for the Hawai'i Kai branch.
We then went to the Moilili branch. There were
14 terminations and the hub. Several terminations failed, and we were able
to determine that those were the ones completed by either the luna
or his sidekick. Our next destination was the downtown branch office. The
luna and his sidekick were deployed there to finish a handful of
terminations. When we arrived, the two Steves were still not done. The
job should have taken them an hour at the most. Four hours had elapsed.
I called Chris again. Since the branch closed at 3:30pm and it was 3:15pm,
we did not have enough time to complete the certification. He told us to
return to the main office and certify the lines there. Within minutes after
our arrival, the two Steves showed up. They spent the rest of the afternoon
sitting around and gabbing. Nathan, Jerrod and I finished certifying the
Thursday June 11
was Kamehameha Day. For most people, it was a holiday. We put in a 12-hour
day at work, this time at the Pearlridge branch. The building is fairly
old, so it presented us with a variety of complications. The luna
provided us with more lunacy. I can't say that there is anything less fun
than being locked in a bank building with the two Steves. First, they just
can't shut up. The luna is always going on and on about his days
as a cable guy. Needless to say, he's the one who has screwed up the most
terminations. His sidekick is a tense wannabe nerd. He likes to talk the
talk, but can he walk the walk? Fortunately, the two Steves worked with
Chris on the first floor for most of the day. Nathan, Jerrod and I worked
on the second floor. Jerrod told me that the luna does not have
automobile insurance. He found that out from Nathan because Nathan had
asked the luna why he did not claim mileage expenses on his timesheet.
The luna is able to afford two computers, Net access and a small
LAN at home. So, why can't he afford car insurance? We have also observed
that a few supplies have been disappearing. Could many of these items like
Category-5 cabling and connectorss be ending up as upgrades to the luna's
home network? Most likely. Nathan, Jerrod and I certified the lines after
completing the wiring. Can you guess which ones failed? The luna
and his sidekick are still somewhat certain that they will be flying to
the neighbor islands next week. Chris told Nathan and I to meet him at
the main office on Monday. We will finish certifying the lines on the 10th
floor and then we will be flying together to Kona on the Big Island.
Lori's daughter officially finished school on Tuesday.
Lori took her to the airport yesterday. Her daughter will be spending the
next seven weeks in Oregon before returning in August. School will commence
for her almost immediately upon her arrival since she attends a year-round
Friday June 12
I have the next three days off, thank goodness.
I really needed a break from the luna. I sat in my favorite chair
for most of the day. I don't know why I was so fatigued. Perhaps I am just
not used to working. After all, I have been on vacation for five months.
Lori wanted to see a movie tonight. So, we took the bus to Kahala Mall.
We wanted to see either The Truman Show or Bulworth. However,
our plans were thwarted when we discovered that we missed the earlier shows.
We could have caught a later show, but that would have meant we would
not return home until very late. So, we opted to spend the evening at Barnes
& Noble. As usual, I spent my time reading computer nerd magazines.
Ironic, isn't it? Here I am, an unskilled laborer, reading computer nerd
Saturday June 13
Lori and I went to Kahala Mall again. This time,
I drove my six-four so that we could catch a movie and return home at a
reasonable hour. We decided to see The Truman Show. It was an enjoyable
movie, but I was disappointed nevertheless. The story was implausible to
begin with, yet the director apparently chose to include even more ludicrous
situations which did little to substantiate the plot. Perhaps I expect
too much from these celluloid fantasies. Or, maybe that is another indication
of my obstinance to conformity. I refused to give in to the mainstream
thinking which ultimately led to my demise as an unskilled laborer. Then
again, the ol' lavahead's life has been on the Net now for three years
much in the same spirit of experimentation as The Truman Show. The
one exception is that the ol' lavahead writes, directs, and stars in his
own show. And, unlike Truman Burbank, the ol' lavahead is lost in obscurity.
Sunday June 14
There really isn't much to write about these days.
And, I had thought that I would write on an "as needed" basis. So far,
that hasn't been the case. Maybe I'm like the luna in that I have
an hidden agenda. What is that agenda? Why, to tell my woeful tale to anyone
and everyone who will listen, of course! But, this isn't The Truman
Show. I can't even think of new titles for the daily entries anymore.
I figure that I am just going through the motions because I have nothing
better to do. The journal is the centerpiece of LoserNet. Now, that's what
I call pitiful! Did you notice that we use the same pathetic image files
over and over again? That's because we haven't snaked any new images from
other sites in a long time. Did you notice that the humor is all but gone?
That's because the mind has gone to mush. And, what about that Governor
nonsense? Where is the so-called whitepaper? It's not done. It may never
be done just like so many other parts of LoserNet. It's all in the mind
... the mind of a psycho, that is.
Monday June 15
After completing the certification of the 10th
floor cabling, Nathan and I flew to the Kona coast on the Big Island with
Chris. The flight took all of 20 minutes. We took off from Honolulu and
barely had enough time to finish our complimentary beverages before landing
at Kona International Airport. From the air, I observed that there appeared
to be no useful land per se in Kona. There were distinct patterns
of lava flows from a time long gone. The only natural vegetation resembled
the weed-like grass found in a desert. The airport itself was mainly comprised
of several small kiosk-like structures. We quickly assembled our supplies
and left in a rental car. Kailua-Kona is about eight miles south of the
airport. The drive confirmed the prevalent lava formations that I had seen
from the air. Heaps of lava rock were excavated along the side of the road.
Some of the residents of Kona had spent quite a bit of time collecting
white colored rocks and used them to to form words. Messages of all types
were laid out along the entire lava trail to Kailua-Kona. Needless to say,
all of this lava made the ol' lavahead feel right at home.
I have never been to Kona before, so I was somewhat
surpised at how barren it was. It almost reminded me of Bakersfield. The
western slope of Mauna Kea was barely visible. The sky was extremely overcast
because of the high concentration vog (volcanic smog). It was also considerable
warmer and more humid in Kona than in Honolulu. Things have really changed
on the Big Island. K-Mart and Wal-Mart are there along with every other
chain store or fast food joint. Traffic was heavy. It took us three hours
to finish the cabling at the branch office there. We took a short walk
to one of the shopping plazas because Nathan wanted to buy some cookies
that are only available on the Big Island. The shopping plaza was a typical
tourist trap. The prices were extremely high. Nathan bought a small gift
box of those exclusive cookies. It cost him close to $20 if you can believe
it. Chris also bought some cookies. I refrained because there was no way
in hell I was going to spend that kind of dough on second-rate cookies.
Frankly, I prefer those stale Lady Lee cookies available only at Lucky's!
Well, hey! They only cost $1.49 for a whole package!
We returned to the airport to see if we could catch
an earlier flight back to Honolulu. There were none so we waited about
two hours. We arrived back in Honolulu at 7:30pm. I was extremely tired,
and I still had to take the bus home. I finally arrived at home at 8:45pm.
Chris wanted us to meet at the airport tomorrow, but I didn't want to catch
a bus at 5:30 in the morning just to make it to the airport by 8 o' clock.
I suggested that Jerrod take my place tomorrow since he wanted to go to
Maui anyway. Chris approved the switch, so I will be going to the Kailua
branch tomorrow to work with the luna and his sidekick. I will be
flying to Kauai with Chris and Nathan on Wednesday.
Tuesday June 16
When I arrived in Kailua this morning, I was surprised
to see Jerrod there along with the luna and his sidekick. Apparently,
Chris was not able to get in touch with Jerrod in time, so just he and
Nathan ended up going to Maui. We could not get much done because of the
building itself. Another contractor may be required to do some specialty
work. The luna called Chris in Kahului and detailed the situation.
We were directed to move on to the Kane'ohe branch. Chris also decided
that he and Nathan would complete the outer island jobs. Thus, Jerrod and
I were to continue working with the two Steves. In actuality, we had a
fun day. We all worked well together and there were no incidents. Tomorrow,
we will install the cabling at the Waipahu branch. It will take me over
two hours to get there by bus. However, I'm looking forward to it. We only
have two more days before we are all unemployed again. So, we will make
the best of it.
in the Army
Wednesday June 17
The bus ride to Waipahu took a little longer than
two hours. However, the trip was enjoyable. When I finally arrived in Waipahu,
Nathan was waiting for me. He and I were being redeployed. So, I made the
long trip to Waipahu for nothing. I was actually surprised to see him there
since he was supposed to be flying with Chris to Kauai. Nathan and I spent
the rest of the day certifying the cables at the different branches that
were suposedly completed. We also had to repair a few of the luna's
mistakes. The sad part is that we were not carrying any tools, so we could
not complete a few of the repairs. Thus, we will have to return to these
branch offices yet again. The last branch we serviced was in Hawai'i Kai,
so Nathan dropped me off at home after work.
I met Lori at Kahala Mall as is our usual Wednesday
night ritual. Instead of going to Barnes & Noble, we decided to see
Bulworth. The movie was somewhat humorous but it was also disappointing.
Most of the movie was contrived and predictable. The message, as it were,
was obscured by the lack of passion in the performances. The obligatory
romance subplot obfuscated the meaning even further. Why I am critiquing
this movie is beyond me. I'm not a movie reviewer. Well, hey! I'm just
a boy in the army!
Thursday June 18
Another two-hour bus ride and I found myself back
in Waipahu. The five of us all worked together for the first time in a
while. We spent the first hour waiting for a FedEx delivery. The luna
and his crew ran out of cabling yesterday. That is why we are back in Waipahu
again today. I did not find this out until after 11pm last night. I had
just returned from Kahala Mall. Somehow I just knew that I would end up
in Waipahu. We finished installing the cabling at around two o' clock.
I then spent another two hours on the bus with a 25-minute stopover at
Ala Mo's. So, I effectively spent as much time today on the bus as I did
Friday June 19
After spending yet another day traversing the
island, I was extremely fatigued. Nathan and I went back to the same branch
offices we visited on Wednesday to complete the repairs. The luna
and his crew were in Kane'ohe. Surprisingly, they were finished with that
branch at two o' clock. That was the last stop for us. We certified the
lines and did the usual repairs. Nathan dropped me off downtown. I stopped
in at Lori's office and the place was closed. So, I took the express bus
home. It turns out that the office closed early and so Lori went home early.
We went to see the X-Files movie tonight.
Does anyone know what is going on in this movie? Not much seemed to make
sense to me. It was an exciting movie nonetheless. Finally, let's catch
up on the news, shall we? Kevin (firstname.lastname@example.org) has decided
to remain in Kansas. He writes, "Kansas is a damn fine place to live and
I think that this is where I'm going to be for a long, long time. Heck,
any state with Home on the Range as its anthem can't be all bad,
now can it?" Say what? This may be another case for Scully and Mulder.
Paul and Barbara made it safely to Alaska after 20 days at sea. I was relieved
to hear from them. Finally, thanks to Steve (email@example.com) for
Sunday June 21
The weather has taken a turn for the worse since
yesterday. It has been raining intermittently. The battleship USS Missouri
will be making its final approach to Pearl Harbor today. In fact, it should
be visible along the Waikiki stretch as we speak. I have opted to spend
my time listening to the Bose Wave radio. Once again, I will spend hours
contemplating how the amazing sound reproduction is accomplished through
the small three-inch speakers. I have one day left at work. We ran behind
schedule so we are working two additional days. I am already feeling the
anxiety of returning to the world of the unemployed. It has nothing to
do with money, since I am a minimum wage slave. I just wonder what I'm
going to do with my time. I have also come to enjoy the company of some
of my fellow workers. I suppose that I could just get on the bus and ride
around all day. Most fitting, isn't it?
Monday June 22
I basically got paid to drink my cup of Gloria
Jean's coffee this morning. We were supposed to install the network cabling
at the Ala Mo's branch but the prerequisite work by another contractor
had not been started yet. So, our last day of work has been moved up to
Wednesday. Chris is flying back to Florida tomorrow, so we will essentially
be left to our own devices. I am sure that the luna is willing to
fill Chris' shoes for the day. I met Lori downtown during her lunch break.
We walked around the Aloha Tower Marketplace and looked at the usual tourist-oriented
fare. Then, we bought a couple of Char Siu Manapua for lunch. On the mainland,
it's called Char Siu Bao.
Well, I read an article about the X-Files
movie while I was at the gym today. Now, I see what was going on. I did
not know that the Smoking Buddy and the Guy Who Blew Himself Up were members
of a sinister organization which made a pact with the drooling space aliens.
My only question is ... how was this deal consummated? Aside from drooling,
the aliens apparently only communicated by growling. I must still be missing
Tuesday June 23
What better way to spend the day than to go to
the new CompUSA store? Yep, that's the same store which did not hire the
oversized cranium. First, though, I met Lori for lunch at Ala Mo's. We
ate at Patti's, which was nice for a change. Lori wanted to stop in at
Tiffany & Company to buy a gift. This is not my kind of place! Frankly,
I prefer K-Mart. After purchasing the gift, she realized that her lunch
hour was almost over. So, she took the bus back to town. I went to CompUSA.
I spent all of ten minutes in there. I don't know whether I have lost my
interests in computers or I was just sickened by the "Team Members Only"
sign I saw beckoning the employee entrance. I can't help but wonder who
comes up with that nonsense. I am sure that fellow MBAs (who have real
jobs) are responsible for this insult to any reasonable person's intelligence.
That reminds me. I read an interesting article in which the author detailed
his experience in world of Starbuck's behind the counter. I was shocked
and appalled to read about the same kind of "team" nonsense including the
obligatory team-building exercises. It's reminiscent of Summer Camp. I
don't know whether the MBAs who came up with the concept have fond and
obsessive memories of Summer Camp or they assume that non-MBAs are just
plain stupid and too gullible to know otherwise.
Since CompUSA was such a disappointment, I decided
to stop in at the Bose showroom. I was the only customer in there, but
no one came to ask if I needed any help. I was considering the purchase
of a Bose Acoustic Wave system, the big brother to the Bose Wave radio
at a whopping $1,079 price tag. Actually, I was considering the purchase
of another Bose Wave radio to give to Lori as a gift. However, I don't
have $350 to spare. I looked around at few other stores to see if I could
find a decent audio system for less. Baha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Haaaaa! There ain't
no such animal! Everything sounded like a cheap clock-radio. Ironically,
the Bose Wave radio looks like a cheap clock-radio with sound that rivals
a real audio system. How does Dr. Bose get sound like that out of those
small three-inch drivers, I wonder?
Wednesday June 24
An early morning phone message from the employment
agency left me resentful and on the verge of violence. I was told that
I did not have to report to work today and that I had to mail in my time
card immediately. I don't know why I was insulted. Perhaps I perceived
that I was lower on the food chain than the luna. Later in the afternoon,
there was another phone message stating that I was to report to work as
originally planned. Whassup wi' dat? So, my last day of minimum wage slavery
was today. There were only three of us on the crew. The luna immediately
took charge. Nathan and I let him live out his illusion. Our last day was
uneventful at best. By then end of the day, I was thankful that this assignment
was over. Lori met me at Ala Mo's after work. She had to buy another gift
at Tiffany & Company. We then took the bus to Kahala Mall. We only
stayed there long enough so that Lori to pick up her clothes from the dry
cleaners. Then, we went home and spent the evening listening to the Bose
Thursday June 25
I celebrated the Festival of the Baked Beans for
the last two days. I almost forgot how good those baked beans tasted. Long
gone are those days that I lived off of Bush's baked beans. Aside from
that, I have done nothing except listen to my beloved Bose Wave radio.
I have yet to unlock the secret of the awesome three-inch speakers. The
folded baffle within the small cabinet seems to be the key. Mind you, the
Bose Wave radio sounds good but it can only get so loud. There are limits
to what three-inch speakers can do.
My mind has turned to mush even further in the
last three weeks. I lived the life of a minimum wage slave, and I also
assimilated the actual lifestyle. The results of the mind as mush are evident
in the journal. Sometimes the mind is better off as mush. When I see what
the so-called average person does and hear what the average person says,
I see no other way to tolerate that nonsense without having mush between
Friday June 26
I spent all day listening to the Bose Wave radio.
There was not much else to do since the weather was miserable for most
of the day. I am not exactly pleased with the radio stations around here.
In fact, I have been in bereavement ever since the demise of Smooth-FM.
I enjoy I-94 but I cannot receive it in stereo. That's the way it is. Thwarted
at every turn, denied at every instance. By the way, I believe that you
can tune in to I-94 on Internet radio. I wished that I had gone somewhere
today because I was a little anxious by the late afternoon. It will take
me a few more days to settle back in to the old ways.
I have not made much dough in the last three weeks
of minimum wage slavery. I did not even make enough to buy a Bose Acoustic
Wave. However, I can afford another Bose Wave radio if I want to spend
every dime I earned in the last month. It's kind of sad to think that one's
life is worth so little. It took me three weeks to earn the equivalent
of a radio. It's not like I had to be taught the value of money. I live
a very frugal lifestyle. The sinister kahuna can continue to take
it away from the ol' lavahead. It won't matter. I will not bow down to
the sinister kahuna nor will I cry "Uncle!"
Saturday June 27
The employment agency called me on Thursday about
a short assignment for today. I got up early and took the bus to town because
I had to be there by 7:30am. The project involved a workstation upgrade
for some of the Bank of Hawai'i offices and was being coordinated by a
firm called Inacom. The assignment was a nightmare. I have no idea whether
Inacom is a conglomerate or just a local loser firm. In either case, it
is staffed with a bunch of jerks. The project manager was a clown named
Len, a smarmy little putz who spent most of his time telling me and the
other "temps" to "get a move on" and, "Let's go! Hurry up!" He kept this
nonsense up until he discovered that his own personnel had screwed up with
the inventory. Workstations were then being swapped in a frantic attempt
to meet the original specifications. For this crap, I was compensated a
whopping $36 in all. Whoopee! Len uses the equivalent of that amount in
toilet paper in an hour, what with all the dung spewing from his mouth.
I actually should have punched him in the mouth.
Inacom is yet another tragic example of the stupidity
we see in Hawai'i. The staff was comprised of locals. Thus, it comes as
quite a surprise when I see locals treating other locals as poorly as they
did. Even the mainlanders know better, which is probably the reason that
more mainland operations are successfully gaining a foothold here. I am
sure that Len had no idea that I am an engineer and I also have an MBA.
He is only concerned with his world. He pinches his sunken cheeks every
morning because he can't believe he's made it. He's the project manager!
Len needs to soak his head in some iced water to relieve the chronic swelling.
Of course, I could deflate his head with a left hook or, better yet, a
swift kick to the groin with some steel-toed boots.
Sunday June 28
Lori and I got an early start today. Our journey
on the bus took us to Pearlridge and Waikele. The purpose ... shopping,
of course! What else is there to do in Hawai'i? Waikele is home to all
of the outlet and factory stores on O'ahu. The highlight for the ol' lavahead
was to visit the Bose factory store. I ended up purchasing a Bose Acoustic
Wave music system. I was able to get a "remanufactured" unit for about
15 percent less than a comparable new unit. Best of all, it has the same
warranty as the new units. The real question is ... why did I spend so
much dough on another Bose stereo? Am I losin' it?
Bose Acoustic Wave looks kind of like a room dehumidifier and it doesn't
sound significantly better than the Bose Wave radio. I also have not found
myself pondering why the speakers in the Bose Acoustic Wave can produce
good sound. It does not possess the mystery of the Bose Wave radio. So,
what happened to the Bose Wave radio? I gave it to Lori as a gift along
with the CD player. Now, she will be able to enjoy the incerdible sound
of the Bose Wave radio.
Monday June 29
I spent all day listening to the crappy selection
of radio stations on my new "remanufactured" Bose Acoustic Wave system.
The sound is incredible but, as I mentioned yesterday, I have not
been so inclined to ponder the paradox of good sound in a small box as
I did with the Bose Wave radio. I may have a defective unit however. I
can hear a high pitched sound when I tune into the public radio station
at the lower end of the band. It only happens with that one station. It
sounds like the stereo subcarrier beacon bleeding in to the audio. Of course,
the problem makes no sense when one considers that the tuner is electronically
synthesized. The problem does not appear to be with the station as the
Bose Wave radio receives it just fine.
The equally puzzling dilemma of why I spent so
much dough on the Bose Acoustic Wave can be attributed to the mind going
to mush. I have rationalized the purchase. I figured that I would eventually
ending up defaulting on my loan in the future. The loan people would subsequently
ruin me and leave me penniless as well as attach a lien to any future income.
I might as well enjoy my freedom while I have it. Then again, maybe I'm
a closet materialist. Maybe the extra dough was just burning a hole in
my pocket. Lori has been suffering from the same malady. She has been shopping
for clothes and shoes almost daily. That seems to be a common pastime here
in Hawai'i. I should mention that the search for the elusive blue purse
continued in vain, moving from Oregon to Hawai'i, until a suitable one
was found at the Nine West store on Saturday. Sheesh!
Tuesday June 30
Well, the end of the month is upon us. I have
sidetracked from my original mission which was to answer the many questions
of life itself. Since I am unemployed once again, I have the time to do
what I do best. That's right. I can ponder about stupid crap and write
about it. For example, I have noticed how I have been thwarted at every
turn and denied at every instance. Take the Bose Acoustic Wave, for example.
I ended buying the only "remanufactured" unit that has a slight defect
in it (the annoying tone when tuned in to the public radio station). Of
course, that station happens to be one of my favorites. Have you seen people
walking down the street just happy as a clam? These are the kind of people
who give me grief about my pathetic existence. They have smiles permanently
plastered to their surgically altered faces. They wear the same kind of
shoes that OJ claimed he never owned. They have big bank, big house and
big sausage. They can't possibly understand the plight of a loser. To them,
a loser is self-made. All it will take is one tragedy and these fools will
be singing a different tune. A stock market crash, a decline in the futures
market, or a punch in the mouth could easily wipe that stupid, assuming
smirk off their faces. Dignity is only perserved by the size of one's wallet.
Finally, thanks to Garry (firstname.lastname@example.org) for writing in!
Life Goes On
Will the Keeper begin to take the Governor's race
a little more seriously? Will he finally give in and apply for welfare
and food stamps like a true loser? Will he come to his senses and realize
that a cheap Sony boombox would have sufficed in place of the Bose Acoustic
Wave? Will he recognize that the strange tone he hears on the Bose Acoustic
Wave is really originating within the cavernous, oversized cranium? These
compelling topics may be covered in the Iulai
(July) edition of the journal.
The Keeper of Lost Lives: bumrush da fools!
© Copyright 1998 by The Keeper of Lost Lives
LoserNettm Love It, or Lose It.